It’s been 43 years since I last touched your cheeks. They were cold and so was the room. The room was covered in white. White walls, white sheets, white towel placed underneath your chin. Remembering the day I lost you always prompts me to recall countless other moments when you were an intricate part of my life. Some say babies don’t have memories but I remember you rocking me to sleep as a little baby. You kissed me goodnight and called me your “Baby Girl”. You made up stories to tell me before bed that were filled with so much action and drama I didn’t want to go to sleep!
I wish you were still here…I wanted you to walk me down the aisle on my wedding day. I know you would have loved my husband. He reminds me so much of you. Funny how little girls look for husbands that are so like their fathers. I am having a great life. I can’t complain. I have traveled the world…to many of the places you told me stories about. I have three sons and I made sure they always knew about you. They are not perfect, but have grown into men I truly believe would make you proud.
I was feeling a little sad today because I’m missing you, Mom, and family members who recently passed…Aunt Vera, my sister Barbara and my nephew Alfred. Although you were not here for all my special days…not in living form, but I felt your presence just as I still feel them. I see you in the eyes of my children. I hear your sweet voice telling me stories in my head as I write stories for my grandchildren Through my husband…I see your image in him as he does the things you so loved to do…fishing, gardening, playing cards. Dad, you were in fact at every event I have experienced…my college graduation, my wedding day, even the births of my sons. You were everywhere I have ever traveled…Germany, Paris, Austria, Colorado, Virginia…everywhere.
So, I wanted to write this letter because part of me knows you are here with me now. I know you have never truly left me because your love sustains me. This is a daughter’s declaration of love to her father…my Dad, Charlie Jones. I can’t thank you enough for all the love you gave me during those short 16 years… before the memory of that cold room. You gave me so much love that it thrives even today. I learned a lot from you and I feel grateful and thankful that God chose you to be my Dad. You, the best Dad ever…and this year as I wish you Happy Father’s Day, I know somehow you are aware of all I have accomplished, my ups and downs and all the special people in my life. I miss you Dad…but as long as I carry you in my heart…every day is Father’s Day!